Although I usually communicate my ideas through this blog, I have the pleasure of presenting you with another gentleman's ideas today. Mr. Christopher Nowak is one of this century's most powerful thinkers; don't let his modesty fool you. Below is an excerpt of one of his most prized possessions, enjoy!
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Problems with “Should”
How often do you find yourself upset with your life or your current situation because it doesn’t measure up to the expectations others have for you? How often do you wonder why you try so hard to do things you don’t like or be somebody who you don’t want to be?
If you thought “a lot” or “too much,” you may have a problem with your relationship to the word ‘should.”
We are often told that we should be lawyers, doctors, or architects. We are often told we should settle down as soon as possible and start a family. We are told even more often that we should not fail. These ideas rarely come from within us.
“You should get a better job.”
“You should find somebody to date.”
“You should be settled down by now.”
“You shouldn’t waste so much time with that hobby”
Well-meaning family members, friends, significant others, and co-workers often hoist their own world-views on us using this word. By doing this, they also unknowingly create a peer pressure atmosphere. They are assigning us their values and, with those values, come their insecurities and their bad ideas.
Stop listening.
Every person has enough personal baggage to work through without being handed other people’s values. It’s important that you assign value to your life in your own way or unhappiness is guaranteed to ensue.
The next time you find yourself in a conflict between what you want to do and what you should do, ask yourself if you’re adhering to your own values or to the values of somebody else. You might find that you’re creating somebody else’s problem for yourself.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Problems with “Should”
How often do you find yourself upset with your life or your current situation because it doesn’t measure up to the expectations others have for you? How often do you wonder why you try so hard to do things you don’t like or be somebody who you don’t want to be?
If you thought “a lot” or “too much,” you may have a problem with your relationship to the word ‘should.”
We are often told that we should be lawyers, doctors, or architects. We are often told we should settle down as soon as possible and start a family. We are told even more often that we should not fail. These ideas rarely come from within us.
“You should get a better job.”
“You should find somebody to date.”
“You should be settled down by now.”
“You shouldn’t waste so much time with that hobby”
Well-meaning family members, friends, significant others, and co-workers often hoist their own world-views on us using this word. By doing this, they also unknowingly create a peer pressure atmosphere. They are assigning us their values and, with those values, come their insecurities and their bad ideas.
Stop listening.
Every person has enough personal baggage to work through without being handed other people’s values. It’s important that you assign value to your life in your own way or unhappiness is guaranteed to ensue.
The next time you find yourself in a conflict between what you want to do and what you should do, ask yourself if you’re adhering to your own values or to the values of somebody else. You might find that you’re creating somebody else’s problem for yourself.
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